small batch handicrafts, educational resources, & simple encouragements.

It seems so stupid now. I was literally sitting alone on my couch and crying at the thought of not being able to create the “nursery of my dreams” for my baby girl who would soon arrive. I remember going to tell my husband why I was so upset. If he could decipher what I was saying through sniffles and sobs, he would have interpreted something like this: “I can’t make her a Pinterest worthy nursery!”

You see, just 8 short months before our baby girl was to arrive, we made some MAJOR life changes. Part of these changes included dramatically downsizing and living a much simpler way of life than we had been before. We had decided that for us, the right thing to do was for me to be a stay at home mom during this season of our children’s lives. And this meant sacrifices. Big ones. It’s not always easy transitioning to one income. And some days the things I had to choose to give up made my inner whiney girl come out. Today was one of those days.

So now, in a 2 bedroom apartment, the reality that I couldn’t have my girl only, fantasy nursery was slapping me in the face. With 2 under 2 we were going to have to do a shared nursery. And my pregnancy hormones were NOT loving it. All those things you tell yourself like, “But this is the ONLY time in her life she will be this small!”, “It’s what you’re supposed to do for babies!”, “Baby girls need pretty nurseries!”, “I won’t be like other moms with cool nurseries!”… and so on and so forth. But did you see the last part? “I WON’T BE LIKE OTHER MOMS.” That’s what it’s really about. A skewed identity.

I’m pretty sure that for centuries…no longer than that… since the DAWN OF TIME, moms have been having and taking care of babies. In tents, in caves, in wagons, on ships, in stand alone houses, in mansions, in 2 bedroom apartments, in the slums and in the grandeur of castles. EVERYWHERE and in EVERY CONDITION.

So how did we get to a place where we put ourselves on a guilt trip for not having a picture perfect nursery lifestyle? What does that look like anyway? Who gets to determine it, and why do we let ourselves think that way?

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE perfection! I LOVE spoiling my kids! I LOVE making things pretty and whimsical and memorable and just like the pictures on Pinterest. Just ask my friends or husband – they will tell you it’s so! Honestly, there’s nothing wrong with those things. (I don’t hate Pinterest. In fact, I love it. And I don’t hate you if you have a $300 diaper bag or a $3000 custom designed nursery, and yes we will still be friends!) But there IS something wrong with letting it define us, and allowing it to make us feel positive or negative about our life experiences, who we are, and what we have to offer.

Somewhere right now, there’s a woman in a third world country about to give birth. Instead of thinking about what her nursery looks like (which she probably doesn’t have anyway), she’s wondering how she will feed her children tonight, or if they will be safe from missiles or other dangers. And in light of that, I’m pretty sure my tears for the perfect bedroom are laughable.  Maybe even deplorable. My “sacrifices” to them are outlandish dreams and riches that may never be realized in their corner of the world.

I am human, so I will deal with this mindset again. I will fret over which diaper bag to buy and spend too many hours reading mommy reviews to find “the perfect one.” I will silently reject gifts of clothing given in love because they aren’t the most “on trend” style for babies at the moment. And I hope in those times I stop and reflect on who I am. That I choose wisdom and love over stuff and image. That I choose a lifestyle that allows for margins in my life to offer love and time and generosity and sharing instead of living up to the edge of society’s pretense of what motherhood or childhood should be or allow for.

That I get off my couch, and stop crying over Pinterest pipe dreams.

Matthew 6:19-21 (AMP)
19 “Do not store up for yourselves [material] treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in and steal; 21 for where your treasure is, there your heart [your wishes, your desires; that on which your life centers] will be also.

So I got off my couch and gave myself a heart check! Yay! I decided to make the BEST with what I had, and came up with my own version of the “shared nursery” of my dreams… ON A BUDGET! We love it! And my kids won’t need psychotherapy due to it! 

Stay tuned for an upcoming post on budget tips I used to design it, with ideas for how you can do your own version incorporating the things you love as well!